Have You Ever Wondered How to Tell Your Child Why You Became a Single Mom?

Being a single mom is tough. You juggle your career, manage your business, and fight to make ends meet—all while dealing with the hardest part: self-doubt. How will your children see you when they grow up? Will they feel like something was missing because they didn’t have the "ideal" family?

The weight of this uncertainty can be crushing. Countless nights, you find yourself exhausted, wanting to give up, but one look at your children reminds you why you keep going. Whether motherhood was your choice or not, raising your kids is now your purpose. But how do you give your all to them when you’re still learning how to live fully yourself—how to move beyond survival and truly thrive?

For many moms, being in survival mode is the norm. We often ask ourselves, “Am I really ready for this? What will my kids think when they grow older and ask questions? Will they accept me for who I am, or compare me to other moms who seem more complete?”

I became a mom at 25, and it wasn’t planned. I had no support from the father, and I couldn’t lean on my family because I had promised myself I wouldn’t. I didn’t want to ask for help. Despite being alone in many ways, I found strength in unexpected places. My work colleagues became like family, helping me through my pregnancy. They were there for me, even when I had to recover from an emergency C-section, where my son and I almost didn’t make it.

But the demands of motherhood don’t wait. Even in the hardest moments, your children need you. This is something many people don’t understand about mothers: it’s not about choosing to be selfless; it’s just what we do. Society often blames us when things go wrong, regardless of the circumstances.

So, when your children start asking about your story, how do you tell them? The truth is, there’s no script, no “right” way to do it. It’s not just about choosing the perfect words or framing it just right. It’s about being real with them—sharing from the heart in a way that makes them feel truly loved and valued. The saying goes, “It’s not what you say, but how you say it,” but for us moms, it’s more than that. It’s about how we make them feel.

What matters most isn’t the exact details or the way you phrase your story—it’s the love, honesty, and warmth you bring to the conversation. Your children need to feel secure in your love for them, to know that no matter what your story is, they were never a burden, and they are deeply cherished. That feeling of love, more than anything you say, is what will stick with them.

Love is what will guide you. But the love you give your kids must start with the love you have for yourself. You can’t pour from an empty cup. Self-care and self-love are essential in giving your children the emotional security they need. That’s why I recommend Radiant Women: Self-Care Secrets for Ladies of All Ages. It talks about how self-care and self-love go hand in hand.

No matter what you’re going through, love is the answer. And not just the love you have for your children, but the love you nurture for yourself. Remember, even in pain, love is worth having.